The Slacker's Tale

“As much as I am blesses with wits and mon’,
I am by far the least favourite son.
Just because I lack the inspiration,
And avoid the slightest transpiration,
It does not mean that I am doing wrong,
You’re just jealous I enjoy all day long.
I wear the same outfit for three days straight,
And after a meal I won’t wash my plate.
I rarely shower, but what do you care?
It’s my own body; it’s part of my flair.
I’m a pro, videogames are my career,
I’ve got the skills and I’ve got the gear.
I’m no weight-lifter but I eat well,
And by “well” I mean plenty, I’m a spell
Come get me ladies, got room for more babes,
I enchant them with my looks and my grace,
…And my photo-shopped picture on Myspace”